... how about this video, which is apparently (or allegedly) an officially-sanctioned video of the International Association of Scientologists (IAS):
Um. Hmmm. Okay. The lyrics aren't exactly Shakespeare (or even Hubbard, for that matter), but at least they aren't about shooting cops or leering at, um, ladies. Still, they do have a certain creepy, cultish quality to them:
Giving solutions to the world and the whole human race
We ain't never gonna back down, leave town, play the clown.
Phychiatry and SPs you know we take 'em down.
See the purpose ingrained.
It's burning in our blood.
They the passing storm.
We the unstoppable flood.
See, cuz we the IAS.
And we're dauntless and defiant.
We confront even the giants, yo.
Handle anyone barring freedom for all.
Cuz you know when we win then nobody falls.
So bring it harder y'all.
Let's make it stronger now.
Unite as one, answer the call.
Come on, and we'll forever be the winners!
"SP" refers to a "suppressive person", and is part of the special language invented and implemented by L. Ron Hubbard. As journalist Janet Reitman explains in detail in her fascinating book, Inside Scientology, Hubbard used his alternative language as a way of further insulating his followers from outside influences, something he worked at with a frenetic passion for decades, notably from the 1950s through the 1970s. Hubbard had a special disdain for psychiatry and psychiatrists:
Hubbard also began to obsess over the forces he saw opposing him, including journalists, whom Hubbard long distrusted and even banned from ever becoming Scientologists. Worse still were psychiatrists, a group that, coupled with the pharmaceutical-drug industry — in Hubbard’s words, a "front group" — operated "straight out of the terrorist textbooks," as he wrote in a 1969 essay titled "Today’s Terrorism." He accused psychiatrists of kidnapping, torturing and murdering with impunity. "A psychiatrist," he wrote, "kills a young girl for sexual kicks, murders a dozen patients with an ice pick, castrates a hundred men." (from this excerpt from the book)
I've read about half of Reitman's book and, frankly, some of what Reitman describes is simply creepy and downright disturbing. I doubt that the above video, if really made by Scientologists, is going to help change that perception too much, even if it also inspires a few laughs along the way.